Submitted by Brandon M, who doesn’t know what fruit is.

Alright, I’ll admit that this video appears to be purposefully WTF, but I don’t think that makes it any less WTF. Though at the time the band was successful in their homeland, Canada, they had yet to break the American market. I’m trying to imagine the impression I may have formed if I had seen this FOX Kids PSA before knowing anything else about the band. Well, whether successful or not, the message of racial tolerance is never something to scoff at. Those dance moves, however, are.

Submitted by Michael S, who wrote his school report on Alexander the Grape.

Taste the burn! These were never my favorite candy. Were they anyone’s favorite candy? I don’t think so. Then again, I never thought I’d hear someone say that Boston Baked Beans were their favorite candy, but someone recently proved me wrong. Interestingly (or not), The Ferrara Pan Candy Company produced both the aforementioned candies, as well as Lemonheads, Jawbreakers, and Atomic Fireballs. Despite not caring much for these “spicy” crunchies, they do evoke a sense of nostalgia; one hasn’t passed my lips since childhood.

Submitted by Mike D, who wears a size 13 shoe.

Of all the things that gave me nightmares as a child, Bigfoot was the most terrifying. And especially the Hendersons’ “lovable” friend Harry. That big, goofy face always seemed more sinister than, well, goofy. He still kind of terrifies me, honestly. Viewing the trailer now, I see that the filmmakers’ intent was not to terrify young children, and that the movie was supposed to be fun and touching. Yeah, I’m still kind of creeped out. Between Harry and the Twin Peaks marathon I had a few weeks ago, I’m never stepping into the woods again.

Submitted by Devon R, who writes to us from the bottom of a well.

Admit it: When you see a rough collie frolicking in the park, you think to yourself “that’s a Lassie dog!” You know it’s true. Though the character of Lassie originated in a novel by author Eric Knight, we most often associate her with the many films and long-running television series in which she starred. We loved Lassie because she was so smart and helpful: She fetched help when Timmy fell down the well, when Timmy encountered a dangerous wild animal, and when Timmy fell down the well…again. Interesting fact: Though Lassie, the character, was female, all of the dogs that portrayed her were male. Take that to Trivia Night!

It’s that time of the week again: ’80s Music Video Thursday! I’ll call this the “Thanksgiving Edition,” although there is nothing relevant to the holiday to be found in the videos below. As always, suggest your favorite cheesy/awful/funny/cool 80s videos in the comments!

“Walk Like an Egyptian” by The Bangles
One of my favorite things in life is learning dances that were choreographed specifically to match the lyrics of the song. Don’t tell me you don’t do “Egyptian arms” when this song comes on the radio. Just don’t do them while driving, ‘cuz that would be dangerous.

“Love is the Drug” by Grace Jones
Grace Jones’ cover of Roxy Music’s “Love is the Drug” is just as good as the original, which is a rare feat. As for Ms. Jones, she was doing the crazy-fashion-music-performance-art thing two decades before Lady GaGa, so let’s give her props. Despite the 80s-ness of the video, I still think it’s kind of cool.

“Lavender” by Marillion
A saccharine video to match a saccharine song. It’s so classically ’80s it hurts.

Previously:
’80s Music Video Thursdays are my Reality
’80s Music Video Thursday is Gonna Set Sail
Bonnie Tyler Owns ’80s Music Video Thursday
Return of the ’80s Music Video Thursday
’80s Music Video Thursday Strikes Back
’80s Music Video Thursday