Submitted by Clement

Here’s now NOT to use a Super Soaker. This video has all my favorite things: fire, fire, and FIRE!!! What’s that? Settle down? OK.

But first: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. However tempted I may be.

Submitted by J Schiller

This look totally pilots the Fashion Failboat, not unlike

this guy

but I’ll admit that for a brief period in the late 80’s, I tight rolled my jeans (hangs head in shame). Hey, it was the 80’s! I think I’ll use that as an answer for every annoying/embarrassing question my little nephews ask me from now on. Them, with my yearbook: “Why do you look homeless in this picture?” Me: “Hey, it was the 80’s!” OK, lame excuse, and lamer fashion choice.

Does the FAIL of this outfit stop some celebrities from trying valiantly to resurrect it? Nooooo.

Katie Holmes Cruise

I’m looking at you:

Oy vey. Tight rolled jeans with sandal heels, no less. SANDAL HEELS. I can’t decide which is worse. Help me out in the poll:

Submitted by C Klima

Oregon Trail had a few things going for it that made it a truly epic game. The first was that there was always a chance of truly random DEATH!, which we here at OUAW support 100%. You didn’t even have to do much to end up like this:

Or this:

The second thing was that since this game was educational, it was in most schools’ computer labs, and all the computers were networked. If you had a DEATH!, you could leave a tombstone for your fallen family member. Hilarity could then ensue:

You also had to do an insane amount of hunting and bullet buying. What’s not to love about Oregon Trail? Educational games FTW!

Submitted by M Block

Ah, the humble Pop Rock–it managed to fizz in your mouth and taste vaguely stale at the same time. Also, you could die if you ate Pop Rocks and drank Coke at the same time! DIE!!! The Pop Rock story was kid urban legend, and it was always “my friend said some kid died from these.” “Some kid” had a really rough time of it, didn’t they? Anyway, legend had it that if you did this, your stomach would explode. EXPLODEY DEATH!!!

As much as I love a good urban legend, it’s simply not true. See for yourself:

It turns out that the reason Pop Rocks were pulled from the market wasn’t EXPLODEY DEATH, but the fact that they had the shelf-life of your average fruit fly. Bummer.

Submitted by D DeRonde

Remember when you’d wait in line to play on these in the summer (while wearing shorts) and you’d risk third-degree burns just to land in an unsafe pile of who-knows-what? The slide at my playground had nothing but cement, cigarette butts, and maybe even broken glass awaiting me at the end of my journey. Like this:

Survival of the fittest, baby! We learned to avoid some nasty stuff.

Nowadays, playgrounds have safety features. WTF? This is one of them, and it’s called rubber mulch, or “playgrass.”

Boooooooo!!!! Where’s the injury potential if you slide into a pile of this? Oh, right.

Metal slides have evolved as well:

I like how the roasting of one’s thighs on a hot day doesn’t hit until the very end, thus proving that you can’t make a slide totally safe. If I didn’t think I’d get my adult self seriously somebody-call-the-fire-department stuck, I’d totally try it.