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Epic Win: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles


Once Upon A Win

Submitted by J Wallace

TMNT will always be heroes in a half shell. Splinter is the radical rat, Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines,
Raphael is cool but crude, and Michelangelo is a party dude. That’s how it is and how it will always be. When the evil Shredder attacks, those turtle boys don’t cut ‘em no slack. (and that’s a fact jack).
Have you seen the new TMNT? Whoever thought that was a good idea, should be fired and never allowed near a script again.
Here’s the original opening (and below the jump are the two newer renditions that are horrifyingly terrible in comparison – not to mention it’s just not the same without Townsend Coleman voicing Michaelangelo):



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» 53 Blasts From The Past

  1. Boompa says:

    TMNT is the BOMB!

  2. Outback Jon says:

    Must be some sort of TMNT conspiracy going around the internet this week. Check the link in my name. (Scroll about half way down to the wedding cake)

  3. Destin says:

    WHO GAVE THIS A THUMBS-DOWN?!

  4. Allison says:

    I loved the 90’s movie version of TMNT. I’ve seen it a thousand times.
    Love it!
    “Awesome!”
    “Bossa Nova!”
    “Mmm, Chevy Nova?”

    • I_Love_Jim_Henson says:

      I totally agree with you there, Allison!

      “AWESOME!”
      “Righteous!”
      “Bossa Nova!!”
      “…eh? Bossa Nova?”
      “Mmm, Chevy Nova?”
      *pause*
      “EXCELLENT!!!!”

      *is such a TMNT geekette*

  5. Eomund says:

    TMNT was great. It was IMO more of a throw to the original fans (now that we’re all grown up) making it great.

  6. Arkain says:

    I gotta say, the original is the most catchy and best song intro, but the newer turtles isn’t so bad. And it’s way better than the live action tv show with the girl turtle…. *shudders*

    • Allison says:

      Dear God, please tell me you’re making that up! 8O

      • pezcore says:

        They aren’t-they added a girl turtle to the horrid live action tv show. I believe her name was Venus Dimilo.
        It was at that point part of my soul died.

        • lyceum says:

          really? …that’s the best they could do?
          raphael et. al were *artists*, *venus* was an *artwork*. there were female artists in the renaissance!
          (shakes head), brings a new level of meaning to ‘objectifying women’…

          • Aikisenshi says:

            Ok, at the risk of showing how incredibly geeky I am about TMNT…
            Her real name was Mei Pei Chi (Beautiful Turtle of Energy, in Chinese, the other turtles nicknamed her Venus), the story was that she was with the guy turtles when they got oozed, but was separated somehow and went to China with a friend of Master Splinter’s. She was raised in China, and was sent back to Splinter 18 years later when her master died trying to stop some evil dragons from another dimension from invading ours.

            No, not making it up, I watched the pilot episodes to see if it would be any good, it wasn’t, but then it was made by Saban, the company we have to thank for Power Rangers…

            • Aikisenshi says:

              *shuddering now at the memories*

              Thank god it only lasted one season, I think. The TMNT creators have completely removed all mention of it from the official TMNT website, last I saw.

        • smashpro1 says:

          And there was an episode where there was a crossover with the Power Rangers

  7. Ink Dragon says:

    I owned the entirety of the animated series, all three movies, and taped the turtles live on regis’s show. I learned how to work the VCR just so I could watch the turtles. I was six or seven at the time, and I’m a female. Not that anyone could tell that when I was younger, tonka trucks, hotwheels, legos, tinker toys, and TMNT. Barbies and easybakes were my little sister’s thing.

    Sadly times changed and my mother needed money and the first thing to get sold/pawned was my video collection, she got about $500 for every video we owned and the VCR.

    • Grimalken says:

      Kindred spirits, you and I! I thought I was the only girl to play with Tonkas (metal, baby; none of this plastic crap). I am not alone!

      • Ink Dragon says:

        Oh yah! The metal ones are so much better, less likely to break if one of your parent’s step on them when they are on their way out the house at 5am.

        wonder if thats why mom didn’t want me playing with them…

    • Lisbeth says:

      I can’t tell you how badly I wanted an April O’Neil action figure so I could play more accurately with my brother with his turtle action figures. Unfortunately for me, they were all short-shipped, so I ended up using a Barbie to be April. In our world, April was nearly three times the height of the turtles. LOL.

  8. Mandy says:

    TMNT were so much better back when they had eyes, not just whites showing out of their masks.

    I have the first live action movie on VHS. Didn’t care for the ones that came after.

    • Pennyforth says:

      Keep in mind that “whites showing out of their masks” was how they appeared from the beginning in the original comic book.

      A big thumbs up for this one….but why not have the ORIGINAL “original opening” up instead of the second opening they used when the show ran on CBS?

      Chuck

  9. Jessie says:

    I could not have asked for a more epic win on my birthday! GREATEST SHOW EVER.

  10. CWhut says:

    I remember the Ninja Turtles from the second clip… That’s the one that I grew up with.

  11. CaliforniaDave says:

    April O’Neil…red hair, tight yellow body suit…

    …sorry, what?

    • SBMShaneomaniac says:

      I went as April O’Neil in the yellow for halloween about 5 years ago, complete with video camera. Won the costume contest too. It was awesome.

  12. Pro says:

    4Kids on the third.

    I am excepting the worst :(

  13. hoshi says:

    i think the 3rd clip is actually pretty darn catchy. the 2nd clip had me feeling like i was watching a sesame street clip. “one! two! three! four!”

    but yeah, i grew up with the original turtles. and i LOVED them. ^_^ the first live action movie was incredible too.

  14. Lilly says:

    Well, in the defense of the newer series, that’s more in the spirit that the original comic was in.

    But personally, the 1980s cartoon will definitely always be first in my heart. My second Halloween, my big brother and I both went as Ninja Turtles. XD

  15. velcrodots says:

    OMG now THIS was a cartoon. None of this namby-pamby-shoot-lazers-from-my-hand crap thats on nowdays; we’re talking turtles…who are also ninjas!
    Win!

  16. hhead says:

    I LOVE THE ORIGINAL!!! I REFUSE TO WATCH ANY OTHER ONE!!!

    • fernblatt says:

      I’m with you on that.

      Extra points for anyone who has any of the original (pre-toon) “underground” comix!!

      • ophelia says:

        I have all of them, including the four TMNT specials (one dedicated to each turtle) and Fugitoid. Plus a bunch of crazy crossovers. :)

  17. krtprime says:

    While the intro music sucks, I actually really dig the newer animated iterations of TMNT. Stylistically speaking, they’re much closer to the Eastman & Laird comics I used to read as a kid.

    For one, Casey Jones has a much bigger role in it than in the original series, and April isn’t portrayed as the prototypical damsel in distress……..aside from the opening encounter with the Mousers, that is. And best of all, Splinter is a total bad-ass……..he’s almost always right in the thick of the combat with his sons during any kind of fight. He needs a wallet that says ‘Bad Mother****er’ on it……..

  18. heruyan says:

    ohhhh man… TMNT was sooooo goooooood

    and how about them live-action films, at least the first anyway.

  19. BRMBug says:

    The newer serieseseses aren’t that bad. Plus Leonardo is voiced by Dean Venture, so that’s a whole new level of win.
    (also, the latest run got revamped art, and they have eyes now)

  20. Anonymous says:

    Lol, I have the first series from the 90s on VHS (good ol’ chunky black tapes). There’s something wonderful about a bunch of human-sized turtles running around with a red-head news reporter in a onezie. Lawlz…

    These guys did everything! They met robots, went to the age of the dinosaurs, and dressed up like the muskateers for a parade! Turtle Power!

    Aside form spiderman, I think this cartoon had the weirdest villans ever… Remember that talking brain that did all its evil deeds from its little minion tummy-case?

    Though, I don’t really like the new ones where they made them all bad-ass with white eyes. >_<

  21. some_guy says:

    You all fail for not bringing up Krang.

    Krang, the little brain guy (with stubby little arms made of brain) and his robot body and giant sphere thing underground really made the show in the later years. He was hilarious.

    Also, I empathized with Donatello as a kid. He was the smart one, always making gizmos. Now I’m an engineer (but alas, do not carry a staff).

  22. warrior says:

    Okay, okay, the newer TMNT theme song sucks compared to the old one. I don’t think that song can be topped, no matter who tries.

    But aside from that the new show is actually better in almost every regard, unless you’re still 5. And probably is a bigger “nostalgia win,” seeing as it actually adapts a ton of stories from the original pre-cartoon comic books. The Turtles behave more like ninjas (no copout robot Foot ninja, more actual fighting, no sauntering down the street in broad daylight) …the way they were intended. Humor is still important; it just isn’t the main event.

    Don’t get me wrong, I love the old show – it introduced me to the TMNT. But if you get past the theme song (skippable on the DVDs!) the new show owns it hard.

    At least… until the network executives saw how dark the show was getting, freaked out, and dumbed it down into Future Silly Cyber turtles. :| They might as well have just stopped making new shows and started reairing the ’80s one at that point… it’s miles better than “Fast Forward” or “Back to the Sewers” and probably fits their target demographic anyway.

  23. Waffle-Copter says:

    Now they’re Adult Mutant Ninja Turtles, and just not as fun as they used to be.
    I heard Donatello took up accounting at a firm in Michigan…

  24. Dave says:

    I remember this from my childhood, I also remember TMNT pizzas that had apple on them being released when everyone was turtle crazy.

    BUT here in the UK the word Ninja in the title was replaced with Hero because of some political correctness bollocks I guess. The theme song was also re-written because I have never seen a version of the titles with ninja in it until I was the video posted here :)

  25. DrFurball says:

    Someone should suggest the original comics to be featured on here.
    Y’know, the ones that inspired the TV series. The same ones that the current toon and movies are based on?

  26. Bouncy says:

    I have to say that only in nostalgia can someone think that the original cartoon is better than the more recent TMNT cartoon. I practically got down on my knees and thanked god when, on the new show, April was a computer programmer and assistant to Baxter Stockman like she was in the original comic book instead of being a reporter.

    Though I did love the original cartoon, it’s nothing like the original comic.

  27. Brant says:

    Have you seen the new TMNT? Whoever thought that was a good idea, should be fired and never allowed near a script again.
    ****
    That would be Peter Laird, co-creator of the TMNT.

  28. P_KnutZ says:

    Still have all four original Turtles, Master Splinter, Shredder, BeBop, Rocksteady, April O’Neil, Casey Jones, Krang (with the small robot carrier), Baxter Stockman, and one Foot Soldier in their original, unopened packaging. I got creative one Christmas and told several family members to buy the same ones so that I could have duplicates to keep in their packages because I knew how bad ass they would be. They are going to my sons when they are older. Along with the two large tubs full of the opened and played with action figures.

    I enjoy them so much

  29. Zoe says:

    BATTLE TOADS!!!

  30. Chilean Visitor says:

    My childhood heroes!

  31. Sarhii says:

    I was the only girl in my school who played ninja turtles with the boys on the playground.

  32. jam says:

    I love this website, and the ninja turtles is really, really taking me back. my mom actually sewed me life size ninja turtles for my birthday when I was 7. I think they must still be hidden away in the attack somewhere.

    I think I still have the action figures too. there was definitely a sidecar that shot a big purple missle. I think.

    I wanted a flying space hoopty like the neutrinos rode around in.

  33. Kelly says:

    They were awesome before someone tweaked them and made them too serious.

  34. kiddude7 says:

    Yes! 1,2,3,4 TURTLES! Whoot!

  35. kiddude7 says:

    Yes! 1,2,3,4 TURTLES! Whoot! TMNT ROCKS

  36. Mia says:

    I still own TMNT: Turtles in time on my SNES :D I love playing it from time to time since it takes me back to the old days and it is such a good game!


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